Things are looking up!

I received two emails overnight from women – one from Sudan and one from Russia – offering me long-term relationships (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) in exchange for travel accommodations. I just have to transfer the appropriate amount from my account. And an email from an overseas bank asking me for sensitive personal information in exchange for $580 million!! I’m rich and a ladies’ man! ... Actually, I think I'll file all three under “scams to avoid.”